One of the most common problems is the misunderstanding between teens and their parents. It has always been a problem but each generation becomes more difficult than the previous. Teenagers think that they are old enough to have their own opinion, while their parents don’t take their opinion into account. It is not right. Adults should try to give more attention to their children especially at such a difficult age.
Communication between parents and teenagers often turns into deaf conversation. The child strives for independence, tries to establish himself, to defend his opinion. Adults at all costs try to maintain their authority, and that’s why, many things are not allowed to children. Negative communication is a common cause of chronic conflict. There are three main questions that I would like to talk about.
1. What factors affect the bad relationship between teenagers and parents?
The first factor of the bad relations between parents and teenagers is misunderstanding. That is, parents do not understand the child, and the teenager does not understand that parents demand from him. Misunderstanding arises when parents want that their child arrived as they want, but he arrives differently. There are different disagreements, they swear, and the reason for all this misunderstanding is natural. The second factor of a bad relationship is the lack of time. Parents do not understand that for teens the most important thing is spending time with them. They should spend time together, go for a walk, go somewhere. Pastime with adolescents well appears on the future life of adolescents. The last factor: eternal advice or reproaches of parents. Suppose a teenager has a problem, and instead of helping him to listen to him, they begin to condemn and rebuke him.
2. Why do teenagers join subcultures?
During adolescence, teenagers strive to form independent adult identities. Experimenting with different social groups is one way of doing this. It’s how your child can test out being someone new – someone separate from your family. Belonging to youth subcultures or social groups can also be a way for teenagers to decide what they identify with in the adult world. It gives your child a way of exploring his own values and deciding whether he agrees with your values. Social groups can offer a set of guidelines about how to behave, dress and think. Dressing, behaving and thinking like the rest of a subculture can give your child a sense of belonging and identity. Belonging to a subculture can boost your child’s social skills and teach her the rewards of commitment. It can also just be fun. For young people who choose to belong to subcultures, membership might be long term, short term, or on and off. All of this can be challenging for parents, but it isn’t unusual and can be a passing phase. Punks, hippies, emo, skinheads, goths – all these subcultures are young people who dress appropriately, listen to certain music and spend time in certain places. Every young person chooses a subculture “for themselves” and tries to fully comply with its rules and laws.
3. How do the relations between parents influence the child?
It has long been known that all happy families begin with good relations between parents. Undeniable fact: conflicts between parents harm the psyche of children, critically reduce the quality of their lives. Constant conflicts between parents in marriage often cause behavioral and emotional problems, including depression, in children. Nevertheless not only conflicts traumatize the younger generation. Emotional separation between partners often leads to the separation of one of them from children.
In conclusion, I would like to say that the ability to solve or avoid problems in the family depends on both parents and children. If the relationship between parents and children is based on love, mutual respect, and kindness, the family will be happy.
Teenagers also need more freedom of choice and less pressure. Parents must be more attentive and close to their children if they do not want to have serious problems. Modern teenagers are luckier than other generations for having the freedom of choice and life full of possibilities. It’s a “computer-based” generation.
From my point of view, all these problems are connected with a lack of attention and understanding. All teenagers want to be heard and treated as adults. It’s important for their to trust the people around and stay ourselves.
Dyuikenova Ruzana
